Exit and Support Network

Often Feel Lost and Alone

My parents were members of Worldwide Church of God when I was born (1966); therefore, I was raised under the WCG doctrines. I grew up in a small town that was inundated with WCG members. So many of our neighbors/friends were members of WCG. That was fine. 

I attended Imperial School, which was a horrifying experience. My memories of 1st grade are gut wrenching. I remember being spanked in front of the class because I had to go to the bathroom. Another time, I raised my hand to tell the teacher that I was sick and she kept saying, "I'll be there in a minute." She was getting very impatient with me. Well, by the time she got to me I threw up on her book. She became irate and told me how bad I was and sent me to the corner until my mother was notified. After the illness passed (a couple days), I returned to school and she made me use the same workbook that I had vomited on! She had us so scared of our parents, that I never reported this to them. 

A couple years later, I transferred to "public schools"--oh, teachers were so nice and the kids had so much freedom! That was my first taste of what life could be like away from WCG. However, I never felt like I truly fit in. I was unable to participate in birthday parties, Christmas parties, valentines parties, etc. I desperately tried to be like everyone else, but was held back. Now, as an adult, I often feel lost and alone. I have a hard time making friends, but so desperately want them. I'm on my second marriage (the first fell apart because I was incapable of affection--something the "church" never taught nor encouraged parents to show), although I do have one son from my first marriage. My current husband is older than I am, attends church (alone) each Sunday, and is so caring and compassionate--all the things I needed as a child and need now.

I would love to talk to someone in this organization. I would like to channel my anger/fear of God, so that I can learn to trust and believe in Him.

By Brianna - Child survivor of WCG
December 1, 2003

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