Gerald Flurry, Fred Dattolo, Tim Oostendarp, Cal Culpepper, Eric Anderson, Jim Cocomise and John Chandler
I hold you responsible for the death of my daughter Janet De Gennaro.
Not one of you took on the responsibility to care and guide my daughter’s spiritual, emotional and mental stability. Instead, you forced her to have No-Contact with her family. She was full of life and joy during the many years she lived with us until she was ordered to “get out of that house” by Fred Dattolo.1
What was the quality of the counseling my daughter and David Privratsky received from Cal Culpepper and other ministers? Were these men qualified to give spiritual and physical marriage counseling? Have any of them received the necessary training?
My daughter and David Privratsky were counseling for two whole years before their marriage was approved. With seven ministers counseling them, we can only imagine the unbearable stress that was placed upon them. Did any of these ministers consider the emotional stress Janet would experience living in a new country, in a small, secluded town, where she knew no one? This stress was compounded by Gerald Flurry’s No-Contact policy, which meant she could not talk to her parents or brother.
Did the ministers encourage David Privratsky to be aware of Janet’s mental and emotional state as a result of moving to a completely different environment, while at the same time being cut off from her family?
Cal Culpepper was the main marriage counselor. We now know he made threats to call off the marriage if she had any contact with her family. He made her life miserable with no regard for the mental stress he was putting her under. He, and Eric Anderson, even questioned her obedience to “That Prophet” with more threats of calling off the marriage if she did not comply with the harsh, PCG-enforced No-Contact policy.
My wife and I became very concerned for Janet when we saw her wedding pictures and realized how much weight she had lost. Her face was thin and her smile was only partial. Only a close family member would know that. We tried to communicate with her many times, but as she was under strict instructions, we received no response.
It wasn’t until after Janet’s death that, for the first time, we were finally able to meet David Privratsky and his mother. We learned that he forbade Janet from speaking to us due to Gerald Flurry’s No-Contact policy. He also admitted that he didn’t know how to handle Janet’s anxiety. He handed us some notes that she had written to explain what was going on in her mind and how you, collectively, twisted her perspective:
“I need to do that which is right in God’s sight and put God first. And that means No-Contact with my family, which is fine. They have to know that I’ve put God first in my life and that they need to do the same. I love my family and I don’t talk to them out of love as God commands.”
It breaks my heart to realize my daughter was deceived by you into believing she was obeying God. She was led by ministers who are blind. You departed from the Word of God, which instructs children to honor their parents and relied on Gerald Flurry’s evil edict to strike fear into the trusting people of God.
What is the fruit of the PCG? We attended this organization for about fourteen years. You are a false prophet, Gerald Flurry, preaching constantly about outsiders plotting to “attack us.” The real truth that our family experienced was that the attack came from within by none other than Gerald Flurry and his terrorist ministers.
God is against you! God requires His ministers2 to serve His people with love and mercy. Jeremiah 23 and Ezekiel 34 make it plain that God is against false prophets and ministers. You should read these chapters and apply the verses to yourselves.
“Woe be to the pastors that destroy and scatter the sheep of my pasture,3 saith the LORD. Therefore thus saith the LORD God of Israel against the pastors that feed my people; You have scattered my flock,and driven them away and have not visited them: behold, I will visit upon you the evil of our doing, said the LORD.” (Jeremiah 23:1, 2)
“The diseased have you not strengthened, neither have you healed that which was sick, neither have you bound up that which was broken, neither have you brought again that which was driven away, neither have you sought that which was lost; but with force and with cruelty have you ruled them.” (Ezekiel 34:4)
Did Christ apply the PCG No-Contact Policy?
The scriptures are clear that Christ’s brothers did not believe He was the Son of God. Did Christ cut off His physical family? The answer is absolutely not! Why? Two of His brothers, James and Jude became Apostles of Christ. Christ must have had close family relations for them to come to the understanding that Jesus was, in fact, the Son of God.4
A Warning for PCG!
There is a just, living, Almighty God who knows every thought of man. God who fights for us will take righteous judgment against the PCG, Gerald Flurry and the rest of you!
“Keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, and that will by no means clear the guilty; visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children, and upon the children’s children, unto the third and to the fourth generation.” (Exodus 34:7)
God promises He will take vengeance for Janet against Gerald Flurry, his children and his children’s children, unto the third and fourth generation5 (including the ministers mentioned at the beginning of this letter: Fred Dattolo, Tim Oostendarp6, Cal Culpepper, Eric Anderson7, Jim Cocomise8 and John Chandler.)
You all caused so much pain and terror that Janet was stripped of her moral compass and dignity. You pushed her to the point that she saw no other way out but to take her own life.
Janet was crying for help. She needed us. Only her family could have given her the love, support and encouragement she sought so much, but it was denied because of your evil policy. You have robbed us of so much joy and happiness. We will never see our daughter flourishing as a young wife. We will never see her as a young mother. We will never see her children.
You have robbed us; nevertheless, as the Scriptures exhort us, we leave you in God’s hands.
“Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.” (Romans 12:19)
By Dan De Gennaro [real name used with permission]
February 23, 2015
Note: The above letter exposes Gerald Flurry and his no-contact policy. Timothy Oostendarp threatened to sue the ESN in 2016 because of this letter. See: I Want to Sue to ESN! and scroll to Letter #4.
“Though the mills of God grind slowly, yet they grind exceeding small.” ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Recommended Article:
Profile of a Sociopath (A number of abusive, religious leaders may exhibit many of these behavioral characteristics.)
Recommended Letter:
PCG Responsible For Many More Deaths (than just the Janet De Gennaro death) (5-26-16)
Related Material:
Our Family’s Devastation Due to Gerald Flurry’s No-Contact Policy by Dan De Gennaro
Is it possible to forgive the abusers? (from article “How to Heal From Emotional and Spiritual Abuse”)
The Laodicean Policy in Philadelphia Church of God (critique of sermon given in June 2022)
New No-Contact Ruling From Gerald Flurry (involves children and spouses who have left PCG)
Why it’s Hard to Leave Philadelphia Church of God
Control and Abuse by Cal Culpepper
Footnotes by ESN:
1 Fred Dattolo was replaced by John Macdonald as Canada regional director in 2018. Also read: Fred Dattolo Gives a Warning to PCG Members (critique of a 2021 Bible study he gave)
2 Are these religious leaders truly “ministers of God”? Examine the fruits. (Matthew 7:16-20).
3 Read: Who are the sheep that were scattered? (Q&A)
4 Jesus was not only the Son of God. He was God in human flesh.
5 Exodus 34:7 is saying that sin has an impact on future generations. (Also see Number 14:18) We can see how this played out when we look at Herbert Armstrong’s family history. God will judge evil doers in His time and in His way.
6 As of 2020, Timothy Oostendarp was a preaching elder in Canada; Alaska, West Canada congregations.
7 Eric Anderson was fired in approximately 2019.
8 Jim Cocomise was suspended from PCG in January 2021. In April 2021 he was attending PCG but not as a minister. He later was no longer attending. Update 2022: Cheryl Cocomise (wife of Jim Cocomise) was eventually made by PCG to divorce Jim in 2022, but she still attends as she chose not to walk away from her 5 children and grand kids that were still attending. Jim Cocomise had a substantial amount of money so HQs may have figured that was the best way to keep getting regular tithes and offerings from her. They were married for close to 40 years.
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